It’s hard to admit it, but as I approach 1,000 days of consecutive writing as logged on the Magic Spreadsheet, I may be losing a bit of my drive.
It’s been happening for a while now. Just kind of creeping up on me a little at a time like, I don’t know, some kind of alien sludge designed to rip all of our hopes and dreams from our bodies and leave us a broken shell of ourselves.
Okay, so maybe not to that extent, but you know what I mean. It hasn’t happened overnight, but rather over months. I thought that upping my daily word count would give me a boost, but alas, no such luck. My drive continued to slip even as my word count increased and left me wondering what I was doing.
It got easier to almost not write some days, which ultimately left me feeling like what I was doing wasn’t worth it anyway.
So now, my word count goal is back to the minimum requirement of The Magic Spreadsheet to keep my chain alive (250). It’s not a great volume and that’s the point. Maybe, if I can release some of the burden that I placed upon me, writing can be what it was to start with. A fun creative experience that allows me to peak inside and poke around in my own mind. That one thousandth day is coming and I want to hit that milestone before I jump off this crazy train.
Maybe, we’ll find that the train isn’t so bad after all, and that I don’t need to jump off after all. I’ll be sure to let you know when we get there.